Finding a different beat.

It’s honestly quite amusing to read how many times I’ve said, “when I get back into my groove” or “trying to get my groove back” on here over the past few years. Ok, more in the range of a year and nine and a half months. But, the good thing about it, is I had a rather a-ha-esque realization the other day that I thought I might pass along.

The a-ha moment…

Why?

Why try to get your groove back, when you always feel off-beat when you’re trying?

If you’re feeling off and out if it, maybe it’s time to find a new beat to dance to.

Or at least that’s what I’m telling myself.

Here’s where it all started making sense to me. SO MANY PEOPLE, (influencers, entrepreneurs, and people who seem to have their act completely superglued together) can easily share their daily routines and how they can be so darn productive in our face, at any given moment.

…and it’s supposed to be inspiring and make you want to do more, which I guess it does, and that information is cool and all.

But, our own definition of productivity and success should be personal. As in it’s ohhh sooooo different for each of us. It changes and needs to evolve and grow. Plus, if you think of it, figuring that all out can be a mental sigh of relief. When I don’t try to just stay on the same darn treadmill, or mimic what someone else is doing, I feel so much better.  Stationary cardio and trying to be like someone else…oh man, the thought of both of those is brutal. Sorry, I can’t stand treadmills.

So what the heck now?

I mean, that’s for us all to find out. It’s time to pour out the puzzle pieces of priorities, and figure out the picture. Go thrifting in memory lane, but bring some paint to decorate it, too.  So many metaphors for this one. So many.

Personal example time: I keep finding myself trying to go back to my pre-kiddo, pre-dog, pre-artist, pre-so many different things days. And that’s not life, that’s not growth and that’s a quick trip down the one-way lane of burnout.

I don’t have any answer to fix it, other than realizing I REALLY need to stop comparing myself…to myself.

It’s ok, if 40 year old me is in a quasi treading water state where some days I feel like a rock star and just nail the to-do list and feel inspired with goals spewing out my pores, and some days I’m lucky if I find my keys and some socks. Hence why I tend to walk a lot and wear sandals even when it’s freezing.

It feels good to be creative, be an artist, to be with my son, to help him learn and grow, to laugh at myself, find ways to be a better person, get excited about future travels, share cool stuff, and to really get after it workout-wise. It honestly just feels weird to try and keep up with social media, feel obligated to share my life daily online, or really be a part of it all nowadays. And at times it’s straight-up heartbreaking to look back at the past. So I’m trying to figure out a kick-ass present. Which, maybe doesn’t even need to be figured out, but realized.

That’s where I’m at.

It’s like my old groove was some hyped-up Avicii remix, and now I’ve moved on to Tell Me Something Good by Chaka Kahn. Or maybe Dreams by Fleetwood Mac.

So yeah. If you’re off, don’t worry. I’m there with you, and let’s just say here’s to finding a new personal beat that brings out the good moves in wherever life has you right now.

Damn this was all over the place, and I kinda like it that way.

Off to find a pair of socks…

Love, Rebekah

*Pic above = Just what happens when I hang out in my mom’s garden while wearing her hat

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  • Some books that maybe would help to affirm what you are feeling:

    Theology of Home II by Carrie Great & Nicole Mering
    A Circle of Quiet by Madeline L’Engle

    Wishing you joy!

  • Oh, thank god. Yes! I SO hear this! It’s been 14 months since I became a mom and I keep thinking things will iron out, that I’ll find time each day to do all the things – make art, take care of my body, work, meditate, floss, text people back, clip my toe-nails….
    I’m starting to realize that things won’t iron out, I am just moving forward with lots of well earned wrinkles.